Ceepin' up with the Cate's: Sedate and Medicate

Vacation Day 1: We had to wake up and an ungodly hour in order to get to the airport by 6am. Honestly I think Kevin does to me on purpose and finds some sick humor in waking me up super early. However this morning I was as happy as a clam to be up knowing I was on my way to Hawaii!!! No complaints out of me whatsoever!!! Our Cab arrived and we are off. We got to the airport and made it right through security with no problems and headed to the nearest place to get much needed Coffee since I had forgotten to set the coffee maker last night. OOPS! So We got to the gate, visit over morning coffee for a few minuets when I hear the over the loud speakers "Ladies and Gentlemen we are ready to start pre-boarding flight whatever to LA All of our first class passengers are invited to board now. Kevin gets up as if he knows what he is doing. And what a wonderful surprise for Me!!! Woo Hoo First Class to LA! Fantastic!! We got in our seats and before the other passengers were allowed to board the flight and the flight attendant took our drink orders so we can be served just after take off and she would also like to take our breakfast order. Hell yeah I was starved! I order the southwest omelette as the other option was not up to standards. The other passengers board and we leave without an issue at all and right on time. Kevin was going on and on about the bathrooms in FIrst Class and how they have bathtubs and blah blah blah. I am thinking to myself that may be the grosses thing I have ever heard of. Who the hell takes a freaking bath on an airplane. I mean honestly. I am served my mimosa and Kevin and I decide we are going to watch a movie to help pass the time. I am pretty sure we picked the most politically incorrect movie on the planet and I was truly laughing out loud uncontrollably as we were watching. The flight attendant walks up and says excuse me is your name Robyn. I look at her a little confused and say aaaaa yes ma'am it is. She says your husband has planned something special for you. I need to know if you would like vanilla jasmine or cherry blossom? I'm all vanilla jasmine or cherry blossom what??? She says for your bath oils ma'am. I look at kevin going what the hell have you done. Honestly. But I didn't want to come across unappreciative so I said vanilla jasmine. I few moments later she returns and says ok ma'am your bath is ready. I am still a little confused but I take off my seatbelt and at that point both her and Kevin bust out laughing, She says honey your are so gullible. I was extremely embarrassed yet somewhat relieved. I wasn't quite sure how a bath works will going thought a little turbulence. Should have known Kevin would pull some crap to make me look and feel as stupid as I did. However now looking back on it. I felt like an idiot I didn't know he was kidding and you it is even worst that after 10 years of marriage I still can't tell if Kevin is joking or not. Anyway the jokes on me! However watch out Kevin as the week is young and you will get whats coming to you. Enough with that we got back to our movie as politically incorrect as it was. You all much rent it is just awful. Awful in a funny way not a bad way. I hope there is Beer in Hell. Really a LOL movie however if you get offended easily maybe not a movie for you. So the mimosa/valium mix is starting to kick in and we opt to turn off the movie and take a little nap. We wake up just in time to land but I have to tee tee so bad there is just no way I can hold it for landing and then taxing blah blah blah... I head to the potty and the flight attendant tells me I may need to hurry as we are landing right now... Tee teeing while landing is difficult to say the least. We land and the prankster flight attendant gives Kevin and I a bottle of Red wine and wish up congrats on out 10 year anniversary. How thoughtful of her.
So we get to LAX and Holy mother of God. These people are just strange. I mean someone should have told one poor girl that control top panty hose are not ok to wear as leggings. I mean Honestly. Anyway we wait for an hour and board. The joy of First Class. I am sipping my mimosa as all the other passengers are boarding. Pull back from the gate and aren't moving... They let up know there is a maintenance issue and if will be just a few more minuets. Hello 1 freaking hour later we are de-boarded and told to hang tight till they know something. Stuck in LAX isn't fun. We could have been half way to Hawaii by now but NO NO NO I sitting here watching the freaks of LA prance the airport. Whats worse is the maintenance issue was one of the poopers being out of order. Ugh I can't get away from poop issues no matter where I go or what I do. I am sure this is going to be yet another candid camera cate vacation. EIGHT hours later we finally board the plane. We made it to Kauai and got all checked in after midnight. We should have arrived a little before 4. Oh I forgot to mention out luggage didn't make it and they have no idea where it is. Fan-freakin-tastic!!! Stay tuned as I am sure this vacation is going to be as entertaining as the last Cate Vacation!